Entertainment

Whenever my students ask me why I would want to teach high school, I always tell them, "Because you guys are hilarious! Why would I want to work with adults all day? Adults are boring." They laugh, but I don't think they really get how truly entertaining they are on a daily basis.

For example,

There's the 10th grade boy I had in 4th period this semester who, without fail, always said, "Bye Ms. C, I hope your arms get better!" before leaving class every day. Of course my wrist surgery was 3 months ago now so the sentiment is appreciated but kind of superfluous, but that doesn't really matter.

There's the girl who comes in during 6th period every day and inevitably says something along the lines of, "Ms. C are you stressed? You look tense today." When I tell her that, no, really I feel fine and I'm having a good day, she usually tells me that I really should go to a spa and get a massage so that I can relax. I think this is hilarious since I'm really much more laid back now than I was at her age when stress was such a part of my daily life that I really didn't know how to sit still.

There's the student who has been bugging me about his D+/C- borderline grade for about 6 weeks because he "really, really, really" needs to get a C. Our conversation goes like this:

Student: Ms. C I really need to get a C in this class. What can I do?

Me: Your work. Do your work.

(student shuffles around uncomfortably)

Student (in email 2 days before the end of school): Ms. C I really need to get a C in this class. What can I do?

Me (in email back): Your work. Do your work. You didn't turn in several big assignments. Bring them in for half credit. Do well on the final. Read the book.

Student (on the day of the final, without any work to turn in): So here's what I'm thinking... (my inner-monologue: Good grief...) What if I wrote an essay about how bad procrastination is to bring to you tomorrow? Then could I get a C?

Me: So what you're saying is, you didn't do your work so you want me to do EXTRA work so that you can get the grade you want? Really now?

Student: Well no... but... umm... yes?

(The next day)

Student: Ms. C I really need to get a C in this class. What can I do?

Me: Did you bring your work?

Student: Well no, but... what do you want me to do? I'll do anything. I have to have a C.

Me: Obviously not. If you really wanted a C you would have done your work.

Student: But what do you want me to do?

Me: YOUR WORK!

Strangely I find this whole exchange perversely entertaining. Frustrating, yes, but also quite funny to tell at social gatherings.

Sketchy

So I'm in the grocery store today and I walk past a mom with three kids in her cart, all under age 6. The kids are trying to negotiate some kind of treat when they get home and the conversation goes something like this:

Mom: Well maybe if everyone is very good until we get home. Can you all be very good?

Kids: Yeeessss!

Mom: I don't know it sounds a little sketchy...

Oldest kid: I'm not sketchy!

LOL!

Wrists Update

First: A note to the lurkers out there - you have outed yourselves and I know you're there and comments are good and no, Facebook comments don't count.

Second: For those of you who have been asking about the condition of my wrists, here it is. I'm doing awesome! I was so utterly terrified when I found out that I was going to have to have surgery and the first few days, I'll admit it, were pretty sucky, but now I am so glad that that's the route I took! If I hadn't had surgery I would still be in a hard cast on my right wrist, unable to write, type, or do a million big and small things that are essential to daily life. My incision is turning into a nice scar and I'm down to bandaids as the only protection - no gauze, no ace bandage. My typing is back to normal speed. I can shower completely by myself including washing my own hair. (Yipee for independent showering!) I can drive! (You have no idea how humbling it is to wait for your mom to pick you up sitting outside a high school with your iPod and a book to read when you're the teacher...) I can wear rings. And put on my own makeup. And tie my own shoes. I can pour milk from a full gallon (if I use both hands). Oh! OH! And I got to go to the gym for the first time again yesterday, I'll admit it wasn't quite as fun since I can't do anything that requires me to lift any weight or put any pressure on my wrists at all, but still, a step in the right direction. So yay, I'm getting better.

Belated Donner Lake pics

A view from the cabin; Roger having to cut my food because Paul "just couldn't handle it anymore" watching me struggle one-handed; a snowy hike in Vans tennis shoes and hanging onto Roger with Carol, April & Fermin; and my signature look for the weekend - dirty hair, a splint and a sling...

The Little Things

I can type like a normal person again! And make a fist (it hurts though)! And this morning I got dressed entirely by myself, including putting on my skinny jeans and even doing the button! Hooray for getting some of my functionality back!

The Big Reveal

Per the Dr's orders, Mom and I slowly unwrapped my right wrist and removed the splint this evening. What I expected to find was a neat bandage totally covering the incision from my surgery. What I found instead was gauze completely soaked with dried blood and only clear surgical tape covering the incision. Needless to say I panicked a little. I'll try to star using the wrist tomorrow, but for now I'm wrapped back up and ready only for baby steps toward recovery...

Frankensarah: The Whole Story

Okay, since I can only type with one hand I figure it's a good idea to get the whole story of how I broke my wrists down in one place so I don't have to keep writing it in emails and facebook updates. So here's what happened:

I went to my personal training appt on 3/12 like usual. We were concentrating on legs and my trainer had me jumping up on a box about 18" high - an exercise we've done many times before. I was getting tired because we were about 45 minutes into the hour session. I jumped up, lost my balance, fell backwards and the reflexes kicked in. This would probably be a good place to mention for those of you who haven't noticed that I have twiggy, ridiculously weak wrists that aren't meant to hold up anything. I struggle with push ups and yoga poses because they depend too much on my spindly little wrists. So when I tried to brace my fall, I ended up instead curled up on the floor with both wrists in extraordinary pain.

At first I thought only the right wrist was injured and even that one only sprained. I hadn't heard a pop or snap, I could still move my fingers... and I was supposed to be on my way to the airport less than 2 hours later. I called my doctor but he couldn't get me in until 3:30 which seemed like an eternity. Trainer did everything he could to make me feel comfortable, helped me call the doctor and my mom, and apologized about a hundred times even though the whole thing was a legitimate accident and totally not his fault.

My mom got me home around 2:30 and I was still planning to leave for my flight to Reno. But we couldn't get me dressed because it hurt so badly to just get my arms through my shirt, so I finally gave in and agreed to see a doctor. By the time we got to the office my left wrist had started to swell pretty badly as well, so I asked the doctor to order x-rays for both. It wasn't until the radiologist called around 6 that I found out that BOTH wrists were fractured. You've. Got. To. Be. Kidding.

Did I cry when I fell? No. I whined and whimpered, but did not cry. Did I cry when my mom started me thinking about not being able to put my own hair in a ponytail, or drive, or button my pants, or put on my own makeup, or write a to do list or grade papers myself? Yes. Seriously. Dependence makes me cry.

The good news: The splint I got at my first doctor will hold me over the weekend. I can get a splint for my left wrist at CVS. I can see the orthopedic Dr on Monday.

So Monday I get back from the lake excited to get casted at my ortho appointment. Only instead the doctor looks at the x-rays, points out the regular fracture in my left wrist and then the severely worse fracture, impaction, and general crushing of the little bones in my right hand and announces (with absolutely no nuance or sense of how devastating this is) that I'll just have to have surgery on my right wrist. And soon. Like this same week. Which means more time off work. And I'm a sub so I don't exactly have sick days. And I need at least 5 days recovery. And that's when I really started to cry and made the doctor go out to the waiting room to get my mom. Honestly.

Surgery scheduled for early Friday morning. Some procedure I didn't ask questions about because I was so overwhelmed. Back to work Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday. Can't unlock my own classroom door, write on the board, pass out papers, open a three-ring binder or put a paperclip on anything. Thank God high schoolers are moderately self-sufficient. Things are challenging but I can function.

Friday morning = surgery at 7 am. Apparently instead of a hard cast I get a metal plate attached to the big bone and 10 metal screws into the smaller wrist bone and 7 of the 10 little hand bones. Not nervous about surgery - just want to be on the other side of this whole thing and on the mend.

9:10 am wake up from surgery in the recovery room. PAINPAINPAINPAINPAIN!!!!! Holy hell! This is what they are talking about when they ask you to rate your pain from 1 to 10. This is 10. I could curse. 10! 10!!

Recovery update: Vicodin is a beautiful thing. So is sleep. And Mom (who goes above and beyond to not only take care of the things I need help with but tries to do it the way I would do it for myself). So is the Twilight DVD release coming at exactly the right time. So recovery is coming along. I should be back to work Wednesday. That same day I'm also supposed to be able to unwrap my right wrist and start working on mobility and rotation again. Within 2 weeks I'm supposed to be able to make a fist! At least 3 more weeks in a splint for my left wrist, probably 6 for my right. I'm on my way!

Highs and Lows

It's been an eventful few days. On Thursday's training I lost my balance, tried to catch myself and ended up fracturing not one but both of my wrists. I wasn't willing to let that slight set back mean I missed my weekend in the mountains with my global village teammates, though. So, highs: had a great weekend with my friends, I don't have to get hard casts on either wrist. Lows: I need surgery on my right wrist and will have to miss work for it, I can't wash my own hair, button my pants, or do any number of normal tasks because I only have limited use of one set of fingers, I can't exercise and I'm going to need a lot of help doing my job. I'm about 30% overwhelmed, 10% negative, 10% shocked, and pushing for 50% still upbeat. It could be so much worse. Pictures to come.